Norah's 1st Birthday... There used to be cake on this plate!
Born of God
Tuesday was Norah’s first birthday… it’s pretty hard to believe that it’s been a year since the amazing night at the end of that marathon labor when she finally arrived! It’s hard to believe it’s already been a year of diapers and long nights, sweet smiles and slobbery kisses. I don’t think I’ll ever forget watching Norah being born. It was the most amazing thing I’ve ever witnessed… seen… experienced… whatever part I played, I was there and I won’t forget it. And you’ll never hear me say that there is anything in this world my wife can’t do, because after that… whoa.
When we got pregnant with Anna, it was a total surprise. We weren’t planning on having kids yet, but God had other plans (and much better plans) than we did. But with Norah, we thought about it, talked about it, prayed about it and finally decided it was time to try for another baby. Of course, even then we didn’t get pregnant right away. People would always ask us, “Are you trying for a boy this time?” ...Umm, let’s see… I don’t really understand that question because we don’t actually have very much control over that… When people asked me that question, I would always say, “We’re trying for a baby… a human baby. That’s all I know.” We couldn’t control when she arrived, who she would be or what she would look like. We decided it was time to try, but God didn’t even wait for us to do that the first time around!
Sometimes when I think about being a child of God, it feels heavy. Like some sort of test I can never pass or standard I can never live up to… What about those dreary, sullen days where my heart feels puny and my soul feels downcast? What about those days where my faith is weak and I’m just not holding onto Him very tightly? This morning I was reading about what it means to become a child of God. John says, “Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God. –Children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God.” (John 1:12-13)
When I read that, I remembered what Tom told our friend June one time: “It’s not you who’s holding onto Him, He’s holding onto you…” This relationship with God didn’t start with my desire for Him and it isn’t dependent on my goodness or faithfulness. I was born not of natural, but of supernatural descent. I was born not of human, but of Divine decision. I was born not of a husband’s will but by the Father’s will. I was born of God. He’s the one doing this. He decided this. He’s bringing me about and passing things down. All I do is believe… believe that for some reason, God loves me, and I’m His kid.